Monday was one of the tougher days I’ve experienced in my life. I know I’m not the first woman to go through this, and I definitely won’t be the last…but the first day of daycare sure has to be one of the most awful things ever. Call me a drama queen, but the idea of handing my child over to someone else, after we’d spent almost every minute of her existence together, was just devastating to me.
I cried…a lot. The teachers consoled me, Chris consoled me, but nothing could make me feel better.
After a tearful goodbye, I went home and got to work–eager for any kind of distraction. Catching up online with co-workers and trying to wrap my head around all of the things I had missed on maternity leave. A couple hours into my work day, when I was missing Arden desperately, it hit me like a ton of bricks.
Why am I doing this?
Yes, I have a great job, working for a great company, with great co-workers…but it’s not my passion. All I want to do is be Arden’s mom. I want to feed her when she’s hungry, rock her when she’s sleepy–be with her all day, every day.
Since college I feel like I’ve been searching for my place in the “real world”–trying to figure out what I’m passionate about and what I want to be. And in that moment it was as clear as day…I want to stay at home with my baby…this is what I’m meant to do.
So Monday night I presented my case to Chris. He could tell immediately how much this meant to me and how serious I was about it. I always knew I wanted to do this at some point (and we had talked about it quite a bit), but it took actually being the situation for me to realize that I was ready. It wasn’t like I was unhappy with the daycare facility or that I disliked my job…it was just about a calling I felt to make the change.
After crunching the numbers and revising our budget, Chris and I decided we could make it work. We know we will have to make sacrifices, but it’s worth every single one of them.
I honestly could not be happier or more at peace with this decision. It just feels right. Sure there are going to be rough days, but isn’t that the case with any job? I’m just so thankful to be able to do this and also to have a husband who supports my decision 100%. Of course, he thinks he’s getting three-course dinners out of the deal. We’ll see about that… 🙂
My heart is so happy and I’m just plain excited about this new adventure.
I think this little gal might be too 🙂
vanessa, i am sooo happy for you! you won't ever regret it. the sacrifices seem so silly to me now, knowing that i've been able to be there for my kids every single moment. congrats on your promotion! 🙂
congrats, congrats! being a stay at home mama is the most rewarding job there is and i know you will love every minute of it with arden. like you said, sacrifices are made but in the grand scheme of things, they are so worth it!
Oh dear, I am already having break downs thinking about daycare. I am very excited for you ad couldn't be happier!
ginny ellis says
Welcome to SAHM-hood! Personally I think it is worth every sacrifice to get this time; I wouldn't have it any other way. Plus, your new boss is so stinkin' cute!
Erica Wassinger says
So very proud of you and Chris for this decision! And, I think your new boss rocks.
Ali Moore says
Happy, happy, happy for you. 🙂
Emily Griffin says
Ahh! How exciting!!! Congrats to you guys 🙂
Congrats Vanessa! I'm totally jealous. And inspired that you went with your calling. You and Arden are going to have so much fun! 🙂
Congrats Vanessa! I worked when I had Jack and I know the pain! I'm so happy that I've been able to stay home since he was two, and though it is the hardest job ever, it has the most rewards, best benefits, and you won't regret it at all! There will be sacrifices and lifestyles may change, but you will never get back the time with your children!
I do want to add, you should move here and watch my baby. I don't think it will be quite as hard going back with you watching her plus you would get paid 😉 did I convince you?
You know I'm in!!! 🙂
Yeah! Very excited for you and your new go-to girl 🙂 You guys are going to have a blast!!! So proud of you for going with your feelings!
Ah… I remember talking about this day at Cerner before we were even engaged!! So happy for you but as you can imagine… Nathan will get an ear full LOL! Of course his response to me would be you don't have a kid… And mine will be touché! Congrats friend!
I honestly got teary eyed reading this. I''m a little pro-SAHM mom, and let me first say, I realize 1. it's not for everyone 2. Not everyone can financially make it happy…BUT ITS WHERE YOU BELONG. No doubt you are following God's plan for you and little A. I'm proud of you. Now…stop eating out and shopping. haha 😉
Congrats Vanessa! I'm so happy for you!!
Congratulations! I just resigned from my job yesterday and I am so looking forward to my future with Charlotte 🙂 By the way, was that you at Walmart the other day??
Yes! Sorry, it took me a second to process and by the time I realized it was you we had already passed eac other! Next time I will stop to chat, I promise! 🙂